Do you know what "hitting him" looks like? You're supposed to- you're supposed to actually hit him! Okay, ya fucking bendy hose! Okay, that actually works out. I wanted to be back in the middle, okay.
Okay, get away from that. I feel like I'm doing okay. Oh god what do I hit on you? Oh fuck, your tail? WHAT? Oh shit, oh shit.
Oh shit! Okay, okay, FUCK YOU! *random noises of loss* Okay, I have an idea. First off, And secondly, *Ash Ketchum mode activated* It's time to Ash Ketchum this shit! Weeeew, come on, Mr. Eyeballs! What are you gonna do with all those eyeballs?
Nobody needs that many eyeballs. O-Oh, oh wait that's fine. Hitting me back that direction is "hey-okey-dokey"! Where are we going, where we going? Fuck you!
FUCK YOU! Ah, these things! I forgot I had to do this section.
Okay, okay, okay, just kill him. Just kill him! Just kill him dead! Just- Just kills things dead! And if you kill things dead, nice! No!
I don't wanna be over this side! MOM! Alright, alright, alright, alright! Just keep your head on a swivel there, Jackaroo!
If you do that good things will happen! Okay, watch the flames, watch the fire in the flames. What's- what's the Dragonforce?
Whoa whoa, SALLY! OH SALLY! (Sally Stageplay?) Ain't gettin' me with them bones! NOOOOO!!
How close, how close? Don't tell me! Don't tell me like this! *sounds of Jack losing some heat* "What a glorious night for me to bring the fright!" Fuck you train!
No one even likes you, everyone prefers the bus! They don't, really. Busses fucking suck. (sounds reasonable) Okay, here we go. Fuck yooooouuuu!
This actually works out, this works out great! This works out great. I like this!
Kill him, kill him, oh kill him! Kill him- noooo! You HONGO BONGO! Oh, you fastidious rectum! Okay, which direction are you coming from?
Which- which one- who wants to go first? Oh, you- you mister sir? Okay!
Aaah! Oooooh, I hate this! Your brother is dead! Just give up! I would like to file a complaint! "Sorry!
This train is only for the dead... but we can help you with that." Hey, okay! Feeling go- what's up my man? What is up, my dude? I've got two hits and I've got a super!
Are you ready for them? Oh-oh? Uh-oh?
Seems like Jack IS READY TO FUCK YOUR SHIT! Here we go, here we go. Yes. Yes, yes all of this!
All of this and again and again with all of this! Oh my god, there's fucking so much on screen. I don't know what's happening. Come on. Come on! Give me that knockout!
GIMME THAT KNOCKOUT! THERE WE GO! That's a sad train, and I am on my way to Palookaville! Oh, feels good, feels great man.
That was not that hard. That was actually pretty easy. (are you sure?) Wheew! Feeling good about that one! Whew, A-!
That felt good, oh my ass is rock solid right now! Ding-ding choo-choo, Let me through, goodbye to you! Alright, we're moving on to King Dice! Get- uhh, worried about this one, uhmmm. Eh, charge shot maybe?
"Inkwell Hell". *gets worried* So I have to fight King Dice before I fight the Devil, right? Oh! Oh, bad! Oh, that's a bad sign! King Dice- there's only regular, and I think that's why you're not able to get this far unless you get all the regular... contracts.
But it's bullshit, but you know what? We're in it. We did it. "Well lookee here.
You actually pulled it off... but you've made me lose a bet! And for that, you ain't seein' the boss just yet. We're gonna play a little game first!" Is that game called "put a gun in your mouth and die"?
Oh god, what? WHAT- oh, oooooh I have to pick! Oh okay, so- oh my god, look how many bosses I have to fight!
Okay, so I want a 1. 1, 1, 1, 1! So I fight a boss, but I get my health up, right? Ah okay! 'Cause I- I heard some people talk a bit about this, but it never really made sense until I've seen it. Oh Christ!
Oh a little septiceye! :D Oh god! I don't like this! Oooh, fuckaloo!
Fuckaloo-la! Fuck-a-loo-la-ley! *many "oh" noises* I like to restart the whole thing over again.
*inconclusive laughter* Well! Okay, we're gonna be here all day folks! Strap on your big-boy strap ons! Okay. I'm gonna get a 3 this time, 3, 3, 3! There we go.
Because you can't get a 4... okay, and each of these are different bosses. Hi sir! Oh god! Oh god! Oh god, what's happening?
Oh Jesus! I've played enough of your fucking friends to know what shit is going on here, buddy boy! AAAAHHH, shite! Fuck this garbage! Oh, and I had FOUR health! Oh, that would've been so good going into the final phase!
Final phases*! I can get more health back though, right? Okay, I have to get a 2 then, oh crap. 2, 2, 2, 2!
Not 2, 3! I can't count! Oooh, oh Nellie! (is this a friend of this "Sally" you spoke of?) Oh god I'm fighting a domino?